Thankful for MS

I am thankful for multiple sclerosis. Trust me those are hard words to come out of my mouth. There are days I truly am not thankful... it's a hard disease. However diseases are hard right? Suffering is hard. But I am starting to see that my relationship with God would not be where it is if not for multiple sclerosis.
My husband had just started residency for orthopedic surgery and I was going to teach Elementary school.  We had it all planned out, but as you might know God's ways are not our ways and his thoughts are not our thoughts. July 3, 2007 is a day that I will always remember. Our lives began to change and the physical body that I knew started to decline.
My first bad relapse with multiple sclerosis happened in 2007 when I was pregnant with my oldest son. I remember going to see my neurologist for the first time in Cleveland with my two week old son and my husband. My son of course was in his car seat, and I was looking around at all the patients with tears in my eyes. How was I supposed to do this? Now I think back and my body was not so bad physically, but at the time I definitely thought it was!
I will always remember my first infant playdate with the other wives in residency. It was snowing and not a big deal to many people but for this southern girl it just added to the chaos! The steps were really slippery from ice and I knew with my balance that I would need to hang onto the railing with both hands . I knocked on the door and the sweet mom who lived there answered the door.  I had to ask her if she would help me get my baby out of the car!
I learned how to ask for help, but most things I could do around the house and for my son . My husband and I were told that relapses with multiple sclerosis are not common during pregnancy. We had just moved when the relapse occurred , and doctors were hoping that the stress of the move caused the relapse.
A few years later, we found out around seven weeks that I was pregnant... and with twins. Not planned and definitely not what we thought! 30 weeks later we brought home our little boy and a little girl. They were healthy, but mommy was not. I did suffer another relapse and this time after I had the twins I begin to decline fast...

Fast forward to now

I am in a wheelchair now and I have lost a lot of strength and coordination especially on my left side. I lost the ability to write and as an early childhood teacher who taught handwriting that is very hard in working with my children! I am learning to ask for more help and I am learning to be grateful . Most of the time I am a gracious receiver of the help my family needs but definitely not all of the time. I am working on that! It is a daily struggle and a daily prayer.
In Romans 8:28 it says that all things are used by God for good. That is a hard verse in the midst of suffering and many times a verse that I did not want to read. It's true though. He will use our suffering for good and to glorify Him.
I have so many verses that I cling to and repeat to myself throughout the day. I have friends and family that help me see God's promises when I cannot. God is faithful. He is good. Trust him and know that our God has great plans for your life.

Verses that I cling to:
II Corinthians 12:9
John 16:33
Romans 12:1-2
James 1:2-3
2 Tim 2:3-4

May they encourage you as well.  Signing off for now.